1.The later you are, the more
excited your dogs are to see
you.

2. Dogs will forgive you for
playing with other dogs.

3. If a dog is gorgeous, other
dogs don't hate it.

4. Dogs don't notice if you call
them by another dog's name.

5. Dogs like it if you leave a lot
of things on the floor.

6. A dog's parents never visit.

7. Dogs do not hate their
bodies.

8. Dogs agree that you have to
raise your voice to get your
point across.

9. Dogs like to do their
snooping outside rather than
in your wallet or desk.

10. Dogs seldom outlive you.

11. Dogs can't talk.

12. You never have to wait for
a dog; they're ready to go 24
hours a day.

13. Dogs find you amusing
when you're drunk.

14. Dogs like to go hunting
and fishing.

15. Another man will seldom
steal your dog.

16. A dog will not wake you up
at night to ask, "If I died,
would you get another dog?"

17. If a dog has babies, you
can put an ad in the paper and
give them away.


18. A dog will let you put a
studded collar on it without
calling you a pervert.

19. A dog won't hold out on
you to get a new car.

20. If a dog smells another
dog on you, they don't get
mad. They just think it's
interesting.

21. On a car trip, your dog
never insists on running the
heater.

22. Dogs don't let magazine
articles guide their lives.

23. When your dog gets old,
you can have it put to sleep.

24. Dogs like to ride in the
back of a pick-up truck.

25. Dogs are not allowed in
Bloomingdale's or
Neiman-Marcus.

And, last but not least:

26. If a dog leaves, it won't
take half of your stuff.