I cant believe it

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

RE: I cant believe it

MyPoundPuppies · Post-a-Holic - Give this person a rabies shot!

Aw! She is gorgeous! What a pretty dress too!

puttin510 · ~Grand Champion~ Gold Medal Poster!

Yep, she's a pretty little filly. And good for you for not going against her choice in whom she likes. My father would have made my life h*ll had I gone to the prom with the guy that asked me. My life was just so cr*ppy at the time, I just did not go. I went in the 10th grade though. The way I felt about alot of people at school, I did not feel like I missed anything.

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

thank you. i try to get her to wear her hair down. she has long straight blonde hair down to her rear and she always has it up. i am trying to find the pic i took at the football game. all the cheerleaders had their hair done alike with red white and blue tassles. they were so cute. i just have trouble lasting through a whole football game on those bleachers and trying to keep my rear-end from going to sleep.

puttin510 · ~Grand Champion~ Gold Medal Poster!

I hear ya about the bleachers. Bring a pillow. they have those bleacher seat things too. I think girls with long straight hair are georgous.

MyPoundPuppies · Post-a-Holic - Give this person a rabies shot!

Me too! I hate watching those make over shows where they take someone with long hair and cut is short. Makes me crazy!! lol

Sandyboo · MAD DOG!

Omg, your sons hair is so cool! i keep trying to talk my little brother into letting his hair grow so i can do that to him! i love when parents let their kids express themselves like that, it's so much better than being stuck being like everyone else. im in gr. 12 now, but grades 8-11 i dyed my hair quite i bit, i had orange, redish color.....i dyed it all the time. thats the only thing i did though was dye my hair. oh and got my tongue pierced just to prove everyone wrong. everyone thought i would chicken out...well i didn't! but my hairs my natural color now, and i've outgrown that, but i liked the fact that my mom let me do whatever to my hair. she also allowed me as many piercings in my ears as i wanted, i eneded up with 10 in total (both ears) and now have 6 in total. i didn't really do much, but i liked that my mom let me!

puttin510 · ~Grand Champion~ Gold Medal Poster!

Thanks he's quite proud of his hawk himself. Just imagine had your mom said no, you could have rebeled crazily. Now you had you taste and mellowed out some. LOL My son got his ear pierced. i'm beginning to think stainless steel is not for him. It healed up nice then all of a sudden it was sort and bleeding. I told him he needs to be careful to not sleep on it with it in a strange angle. If it pulls and makes it sort, it could start all over again.

huronbreeze · MAD DOG!

Dusty...what a cute young girl...you must be sooo prooud. I think that you said you had 2 daughters right? if so..post the others pic too..dont want her to feel left out..lol..

Denise · You have been awarded the Posting Star of Honor!

Dusty, your daughter is gorgeous!

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

here is sarah

-- Edited by dusty082155 at 17:54, 2005-05-27

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

i am not happy with her at all right now ! i have had sarah and her brother josh since they were in kindergarten and first grade. they are now ages 16(sarah) and 18(josh) ,they used to be next door neighbors and left alone all hours while their mom closed the bars. we took them in everynight and bought all their clothes and fed them. then their mom asked me too watch them for a couple months until school got out. and never came back ! i had my three at home and took on two more.i see sarahs mother in her. she wants to skip school or go and not do any work, drink,drug, party and sleep around. and told me she was old enough not to have any rules. this is the third time shes run away.the last two times, i ran around town with the police hunting her down .now she has a warrant on her for violation of the becca bill and she can just sit in juvie for awhile when they catch her.my cousin works at the welfare office and she showed up with some lady who impersonated me, trying to get food stamps ! i about died when my cousin called and told me that ! lol. i could write a book on that girl. but i am done .she had her own room,cell phone,t.v,dvd,computer, mass clothes. all i asked was to obey the rules in our home. we never laid a hand on her, but it got back to my other daughter, kayla that she was telling people that we beat her. i really gagged on that one ! now kayla is on the honor roll, upward bound program,cheerleader, key club. doesnt drink,drug,is saving sex for the right guy and yes i am proud of her. but sarah hasnt shown me anything to be proud of. hopefully she'll get a jolt of reality out there and straighten her act up. til then.....she's flat wore me out !

huronbreeze · MAD DOG!

Dusty..Im sorry that Sarah has you disaponted right now..I didnt no the back ground of your kids and taking her in was a fantastic thing to do..I applaude you for even attempting to do that for her..I can only hope in years to come that this girl realises what a gift she had been offered and will turn around..Im going to specualte that maybe right now she doesnt feel too good about her self and in some way she deserves nothing good to happen to her..that all will fall apart no matter what...so she doesnt try...I hope it does turn around for you...i really do..It must be hard on the whole house hold. Hang in there...nothng is hopeless...Take care

huronbreeze · MAD DOG!

Dusty...one more thing...what is tolo...or what ever you wrote concerning your Kayla and her date...what did it mean?

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

i hope sarah gets a wake up call real soon, but i have literally run myself ragged hunting her down.one time she had been gone almost a week and i was coming back from the 7-11 store around midnight after getting smokes. i saw her walking down the street with a bunch of guys,so i whipped over to the curb and hopped out and told her to get in the car.she just stood there and one of her guy friends starts talking crap to me.alls i know is its true when you get real mad you see red cause that punks face was totally shrouded in red ! i backed him up to the curb and told him he better shut his hole or i'd crush him like a grape. his friends backed up too and sarah took off running. she beat me home and she was drunk.i threw her in a cold tub of water and put her to bed. my hands were shaking i was so mad. not even a week later she took off again with some 22 year old.she was 15. now this time she's been gone over a month and calls here off and on with this crap that she will come home, but we cant ground her or tell her what to do. quinn sits there and argues with her. i tell her "SAME RULES APPLY !" and hang up.the counselor thinks she feels alot of jealosy because kayla is so popular and the guys are attracted to kayla over her. but kayla trieds to include sarah in things but she keeps pulling stuff and it gets around the school and kayla catches the flack from having to defend her all the time. she told me she is glad sarahs gone. and it just shows me even more what a commotion she has stirred in this household.

and a tolo is a certain dance they have once a year and they get all decked out.

-- Edited by dusty082155 at 21:41, 2005-05-27

jawlaw · Moderator

Kayla is beautiful. That is so sad about Sarah. No matter how hard you try she is still going to have that feeling of not being wanted because of how her mom treated her. And to see you and your daughter have such a wonderful life and close relationship, it is probably even harder on her. It is not YOUR fault but she does not know how to express her feelings about all of it, so she just acts out. No excuse, I know, but.... You have done so much and one day she will thank you, but for now, it is going to be tough, huh?

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

yeah thats the sad part because we used to do things together, the three of us. she really started changing when she turned 13. she hooked up with these kids that didnt seem to have "kurfews" and ran all hours and sarah thought she could too. when i started cracking down on her she rebelled even more. i let my kids be themselves,but drew the line on drinking and drugging and sarahs friends all did it and she looked at me as the "bad guy" cause i put my foot down on her. all her nice friends dont want nothing to do with her anymore. its sad. but she's not living in MY house and running the show. i put alot of blame on her mom for the way she just dumped her kids. it has really left a scar on sarah. plus i found out from sarahs grandmother that she had been molested by her real dad when she was just a baby. and josh had been beat. those kids had been to hell before i got them. luckily josh hasnt had the same issues that sarah has

Denise · You have been awarded the Posting Star of Honor!

Dusty, my hat is off to you for having the heart to take on the responsibility of the 2 of them. Not many people would! Someday she will think back to these days and want to kick herself in the butt for all the turmoil she stirred up for you & her family and herself as well. I am sure, deep down, she is thankful for having you in her life. It is hard enough these days for teenagers who have a stable home life not to give into peer pressure but most with the consistency of good parenting do withstand it. She didn't get that from her mother and I think her feeling of self-worth is at a very low point at this time of her life. As you know tough love, as hard as it is, is sometimes what is needed. Hopefully she will soon come around and realize how good life can be for her with a change in her attitude. You daughter deserves a pat on the back as well for doing all she has to make her feel welcome. Thank God there are families like yours who step up and try to do what they can for those who need.

dusty082155 · ~Best In Show~ Senior Board Member!

thanks everyone for the encouragement. i have cried myself to sleep many times over her. and was told by several people to just let her go. but its so hard when you love them so much. sarah left a six page letter this last time she left. and she said she knows how much we love her and have done for her.but she feels she is an "adult" and should be able to quit school and do as she wants with no bosses or rules. even adults have bosses and rules ! lol. last night we found out that the 22 year old that sarah was messing around with several months ago,who lives across the field from us, rolled his car and he had a 14 year old girl with him. she was in a coma and they pronounced her dead this morning. my first thought was that could have been sarah. but she thought we were so mean for turning him into the police. which we didnt do until we found out he was making out with a 13 year old while sarah who was 15 was performing oral sex on him. kayla came home crying and told me they started doing that in broad daylight on his front porch. she said she was ashamed that sarah was her sister. and kayla is picking up all the flack at school for sarahs actions. she is a straight A student and her grades have suffered these last few months because of all the stuff sarahs pulled. so i feel sometimes like i have to let one go to save the other. like in that movie "the good son". sorry so long winded, but it feels so good to be able to get some of this off my chest to you guys who i feel have become my friends. thanks for putting up with me. ........deb

huronbreeze · MAD DOG!

Dusty...what agoiny you must live in daily...Oh I am so sorry to hear it all.and i bet it is very healing to be able to express it either verbally or in typing it out finally...What a mess...and no real good answer to any of it..Just the lesser of 2 evils...I have a question..and please dont take offence by it either..please..But...have you gotten that girl on birthcontrol...I dont know your views but what would even be more tragic is if this girl got pregnant and began that downward spiral...I believe in kids following my rules..thats obvious..and my rules are simple almost exactly like the ones you discribed..I probably would agonise over all of this but tough love would be the corse of action i "probably " would take. You cant candone inapprioate behavior and spread this thinking to the rest of the kids if they think it is ok they will in turn try more junk too..And how mortifuiied your Kayla must feel knowing all the kids in school know what SArah is doing....I would just hope Sarah eventually does clean up her act..and she wont unless she sees and obviously knows you love her but she needs to take responcability of her actions ...If she feels she can quit school..what does she think she can actually do to suppot her self while she is not at your house to sponge off of? I wish that there was a place to get these kids the right kind of counciling...but counciling only works if you let it and work with it not against it. Oh how those teen years have scared me...Knowing my little ones will be there and I KNOW what i did as a teen...and I DONT want mine to do it..I have tried to do all i can and i know im not perfect as no one can be as a parent ...but I shutter to think my Mothers words will ring true.."your kids will be 10 times worse then you...." I say...oh no..im in for pure h*ll then...So..I hope and wish for you the best and in what ever you decide we are all with you in thought and we all wish you only the best..Take care...