>THE GOLFER & THE LEPRECHAUN > > An American golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the >woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, >a big bump on his head and the golfer's ball beside him. Horrified, the >golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, >reviving him. > > "Arrgh! What happened?" the Leprechaun asked. > > "I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball," the golfer says. > > "Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, >so whaddya want?" > > "Thank God, you're all right!" the golfer answers in relief. "I >don't want anything. I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize." And the >golfer walks off. > > "What a nice guy," the Leprechaun says to himself. I have to do >something for him. I'll give him the three things I would wa nt....a great >golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life." > > A year goes by (as it does in stories like this) and the American >golfer is back. On the same hole, he again hits a bad drive into the woods >and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him. > > "Twas me that made ye hit the ball here," the little guy says. "I >just want to ask ye, how's yer golf game?" > > "My game is fantastic!" the golfer answers. "I'm an >internationally famous golfer now." He adds, "By the way, it's good to see >you're all right." > > "Oh, I'm fine now, thankye. I did that fer yer golf game, you >know. And tell me, how's yer money situation?" > > "Why, it's just wonderful!" the golfer states. When I need cash, I >just reach in my pocket and pull out $100.00 bills I didn't even know were >there!" > > "I did that fer ye also. And tell me, how's yer sex life?" > > The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says >shyly, "It's OK." > > "C'mon, c'mon now," urged the Leprechaun, "I'm wanting to know if I >did a good job. How many times a week?" > > Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, "Once, >sometimes twice a week." > > "What??" responds the Leprechaun in shock. "That's all? Only once >or twice a week?" > > "Well," says the golfer, "I figure that's not bad for a Catholic >priest in a small parish."